Monday, October 26, 2009

When Pumpkin Carving Goes Wrong...

Can I just say that I've never had a pumpkin carving disaster like tonite? Because I haven't.

This is how it all went down.

*Ahem*

I ran to Target to pick up a few things...including a pumpkin carving kit. I've never used a kit before. I usually carve up the traditional pumpkin face. Easy, cute and I've never had a disaster.

Ever.

On my way home I called my sister to talk to her and tell her that I picked up a kit. She told me how easy and great this kit was--turns out we had the same kits. Score! This shouldn't take long at all.

And her pumpkin? Cutest, most perfect pumpkin that I had ever seen--she had e-mailed me a picture earlier in the day and it was adorable.

I got home and decided, hey, why not get this carving out of the way? That way we could enjoy our pumpkin all week long.

I asked Leo to pick out what design he wanted. I basically puffed out my chest and said that I could do any of them. Pick one out and I'll do it. This was mistake number one.

He picked out the haunted house with the works--a ghost that's punched out, a tiny scary smile and eyes on the house, teensy-tinsy windows....and so on. I told him what a great choice. How we would have the most AWESOME pumpkin ever.

I got to work. I tried the larger of the two saws. And I bent it. As in it had nearly broke in half. And on top of that? I was practically breaking a sweat trying to cut the lid off our pumpkin--this pumpkin was the THICKEST pumpkin that I had ever cut in my life. Picked up the second saw. I bent that one in TWO places. Obviously mistake number two was getting the biggest pumpkin that they had.

Finally got the lid off (with a knife) and cleaned out the pumpkin--which by the way? Was the easiest part of the carving experience. (Just thought I'd throw that in there).

I then started to trace the pattern.

That sucked. They give you a plastic spike thing and I basically had to cut one little hole at a time...took forever.

Then the carving began. With my two bent saws. I started to cut and cut. And cut. My hand is so cramped that I couldn't even open it at that point. More sweat. More cramps.

I looked down at my hand because it was stinging a little. Blood was all over my finger. I somehow sliced my finger open without even trying to--funny because I couldn't even cut through my pumpkin but yet I managed to cut myself?! This was turning into a nearly catastrophic event.

I then vowed to be more careful. And I broke saw number one. I was holding the handle and the saw was stuck in the THICKEST PUMPKIN EVER. I grabbed the second saw and started sawing away.

And wouldn't you just know that I BROKE that one, too!!

I am then left to carve with a paring knife and a steak knife. And a bloody finger. And two broken saws.

Stuck with the thickest. pumpkin. ever.

The end result was alright. Nothing great, nothing of the spectacular magnitude of my sister's pumpkin. And when I tried to take pictures without the flash to capture the hot mess that I nearly lost a finger over? It was blurry. Go figure. Guess I will have to read in my camera book what I need to do to ensure that my picture will come out not blurry....

The moral of this story?

No pumpkin carving kit for this momma. We will either paint a pumpkin or I'll do it old school like I did my entire life before tonite...

16 comments:

Anti-Supermom said...

Chelle, at least you have made the effort to *carve* pumpkins, I'm guess I'm waiting until Saturday :)

Funny story!

gma said...

Oh, sounds like an AWFUL experience, but one that probably would happen to me, for sure!! I could never cut one right with "any" knife!!
Am sorry you had such a terrible time, you needed to call Leo for some back-up!
I bet it looks just fine.... hope you can get a pic of it.
Happy Halloween!!

llespy said...

We use those kits too. I use a paring knife to cut out the lid and learned the first time to pick an easy pattern. Otherwise, you're stuck poking holes through your pumpkin all night. Also, if the pattern has tiny areas, they break off when you cut them and you end up with huge holes in the design.......At least I don't have to "help" with 3 pumpkins anymore! It would take an entire evening to get those done.

LadyBug-Kellie said...

LOL, sorry it went so wrong! I totally here ya though...my husband did the hard work...I saw his saw/cutter thing afterwards and it was bent & looked just wrecked! Now I know why LOL!

Painting Pumpkins is more fun for the kids anyway :) Good luck!

Jill and Rick said...

Okay, I am literally laughing out loud at this post! Steak knives and simple patterns for me. and Where is the picture? :-D

Love you!

tinahead81 said...

i'm so with you on the tradidtional faces! i'm dreading doing ours this year...basically hubby will cut the tops off, and I'LL be carving TWO pumpkins! i don't know how he gets out of it every year?! i hope your finger feels better!

Stephanie said...

Oh no!

We do not pumpkin carve. We pumpkin sharpie.

This is why :)

Eve said...

I haven't carved a pumpkin in years and this is why. I was always WAY to ambitious and usually ended up hurling the destoryed pumpkin in the bin after a few hours of struggle.

Go for painting I say!

Danielle (Life with the Hewitt Family) said...

You are so funny! You really had me cracking up over your pumpkin carving experience. I had trouble getting the top off ours too and I was even using the biggest knife we had in the house. I had to have Josh take care of that part.

I am glad that you were able to finish your pumpkin with all of your fingers!

Anonymous said...

oo no now I am all worried. I am going to use our kit tonight! I will let you know how it goes :-)

Tales of Mommydom said...

LOL! Never had any luck with the carving of pumpkins either. Hopefully, you gave that squash a good H1N1 filled sneeze to teach it a lesson!

Sarah said...

No picture? :) My girls asked if they could draw on their pumpkins this year instead of carving them. Um, yes, please. Here are the sharpies....

Liz Mays said...

I feel bad but I had to laugh at the comedy of errors. Next year, let hubby do it!

Llama said...

Oh my goodness! First of all you are lucky you are ok after that! What a crazy pumpkin carving experience. Although, I have to thank you because I swear, I was just about to get one of those kits! I think ill just go with the "safe" pumpkin this year. So sorry sweetie!

amanda said...

dude all those kits stink!! seriously we have never had any luck with them ever!!

pretty sure we are going to use some paint and glitter the day of and call it good :)

Kelli @ writing the waves said...

YIKES! Your poor finger! I'm not a big fan of carving myself. I make Pat do it. Painting and using those foamy stickers is much more my speed. You get an A+ for effort though!