Life Glances

* I went out last night. No children. No husband. I met up with two moms at a coffee shop. We laughed. We talked. We closed the place down. Which, by the way, I haven't closed anything down for years. Mission accomplished.

* This will probably sound weird--but it is weird. Around a month ago I noticed one of Madelyn's ears smelled...and not in a good way. She goes to the doctor today--and I may or may not have giggled when explaining what the problem was when I booked said appointment.

* Making Christmas cookies and cinnamon rolls this weekend. I love this time of year. My weight, though? Yeah...not so much.

* I did the 30 Day Shred yesterday. My body is in some pain today. Yikes.

* Reading another awesome book--I'll be writing about it next week. I can't put it down.

* I have really went overboard this year on presents. Every year Leo and I are all no going overboard this year, Chelle!  And then it's always an excuse to why the overboardness has happened. I love buying presents for people. It's too much fun!

* Brynlie is a real life crawler. She crawls around the entire house. No more worm crawling, either. This is full on I'm super baby crawling like a pro, Momma! This is going by WAY too fast.

* I turned my air conditioner back on. It's in the 70's. I hate this. I want cool weather, please.

Why Can I Not Find a Hair Stylist?

Seriously. Enough with the horrible hair stylists. The last two that I went to here in Mississippi have been awful. As in their hair skills are way below satisfaction.

I don't think that I am asking much.

I want someone to not leave 1/2 inch of roots showing from my highlights. I mean, come one. Put the foils up to the top. Apply hair color. Voila.

When I say that I want highlights, but want them to look natural, don't practically color my entire head of hair blonde. Totally not natural. And for the record--blonde isn't orange. Just sayin'.

When I bring in a picture (in color to even help said stylist out) please listen to me. Please, please, please study the picture, study the texture of my hair and tell me if you don't think that this is possible for my hair or your skill level. Don't glance once at the picture and not look at it again.

Don't have your male coworkers feeding you bites of cake while I am your client. Right then and there I decided that this place was not for me.

Don't try to have my buy clip on feathers for my daughters. Not interested. I saw the racks when I walked in. If I was interested I would buy them when paying. Not when I am sitting in the chair wondering who else would come and feed you some bites of food.

My hair currently looks like crap. From the hack job to the horrible highlight job, I am upset. I know it's just "hair", but that is one area of my life that I feel like I have control of. Not to mention that I am paying a lot of money to get my hair "professionally" done.

Someone suggested another salon--much closer to my home and they even have portfolios of their work. It looks like they have fixed quite a few bad hair jobs from their pictures...I am praying that this one works out. I can't keep going home to Missouri to have my #1 girl fix my hair every month!

Now the countdown is on until I go and get my hair done again. 7 1/2 weeks to go. I may beg and plead and cry to Leo that 5 1/2 weeks would be much better...

Thanks for listening...just not happy with my hair...*sigh*

My Little Momma...

 

This little girl is an amazing big sister.

She helps in every way possible...

By giving hugs and kisses.

Picking up toys.

Reading stories.

Singing made up songs.

Sharing toys.

She helps me in more ways than I could ever imagine.

She allows me to see the world as an entirely different place.

Isn't it amazing how much a child can teach us?

And here I thought I was the only one doing the teaching...

Sometimes? LIFE Happens...

A big topic in my household in the past has been life insurance. Due to Leo being in the military he has the option of purchasing life insurance for himself--which he opted to do. The person that we discuss a lot is me. I need to look into purchasing life insurance on myself in case of anything unfortunate happening.


When I first became a stay at home mom I would wonder why I would even need life insurance? I mean, I don't get paid for my daily duties as a mom, so why would I need to consider buying life insurance?


The answer is easy--I do a lot around the house. I am the childcare provider, the one who is home in case the girls are sick, the lawn mower, the house cleaner, the chef--I do it all. Well, when Leo is home he does help out a lot, but right now I am doing it all--and it's exhausting! If anything were to happen to me Leo would need to start finding someone to cover in the area that I was providing.


September is Life Insurance Month--were you aware of that? I know that I wasn't. Right now the LIFE Foundation has created a Facebook app called "What Matters Most to Me". With this app you can easily create a slideshow which will show others what matters most to YOU. Is it your children? Your spouse? Parents? A pet? Your home? It can be anything!


Go and check out the LIFE Happens Facebook page--and it may just show you how important it is to have a plan in case the unfortunate were to happen. Also--if you create the slideshow by September 30 you will be eligible to win a trip to Aruba!


I was not compensated for this post. I am eligible to win a gift card from Mom Select for writing it.

For the First Time...

For the longest time I've been hard on myself about my body and my looks. I remember reading Seventeen magazine and wishing I looked like those girls. Their hair, skin, and bodies? Were perfect. I would look at myself and cringe at what I saw. Glasses. Lanky arms. Thighs that were bigger than theirs. Pimples. Freckles. Crazy, unruly hair.

It's sad to think that I cannot remember a single time when I was a teen that I actually thought that I was pretty. Sad isn't it? I remember cringing at swimsuit season thinking I was "fat" or "overweight" when I wore a size 6 or 8 in Juniors. What was wrong with me? Why was I so hard on myself that I gave myself nothing but low self esteem? Was it due to these perfect bodies in every magazine that I opened? Was it from movies and television? Where did my self loathing start...and why did I allow it to last so long?

I look at my body now. Yes, I admit, it hasn't been easy getting used to my new body and looks after I had my girls. It hasn't always been easy stepping on the scale and seeing that I am 30 pounds heavier than when I was initially pregnant with Isabella.

But now? I'm happy. I don't mind seeing my stretchmarks. I don't mind seeing a little cellulite. I don't mind that I have more of a pooch now on my stomach. I don't mind that I wear two sizes bigger in clothes now.

Some of you may be sitting there wondering seriously, Chelle? You don't mind because why...?

That answer is easy. Over the years I have learned to love myself. My skin, my body and my hair. I have realized that my girls love me no matter what. My husband loves my extra curves. I can look in the mirror and smile knowing what all I went through to get here--to get where I am today.

Because for the first time in my life I love what I see. And even more? I love who I have become.

Need to Get it Out. This is Rambling.

This week has been shit. There, I said it.

Shit.

I'm sorry if you're offended...but right now? I'm not worried about what others are thinking. I'm going through hell right now. Hell.

Not only have my girls been sick, one had a catheter {Madelyn}, both are running fevers. I'm worried about my babies.

And then. Then there is someone very, very close to my heart who is very, very sick. My heart is shattering in a million little pieces. My chest feels like I have an enormous weight on it. I can't breathe. I think about this person 24/7. 

I just feel like there are so many struggles right now. So many tears are being shed. I know I wrote my lucky post.

And I am lucky. Blessed. I know that. But right now I'm wondering why someone so close to me is suffering so much. Why?? Why does God let these things happen?

There are truly some things in life that make me question things. Him. Life in general. I don't understand why genuinely good, innocent people have to suffer. I don't understand why so many people are taken from our lives every single day.

Babies? Teens? Children? Parents? Really?? I don't understand any of this.

I just needed to get these thoughts off of my chest. I'm obviously going through a lot emotionally lately. Both at home and places where I cannot be right now--which kills me.

Okay. My ramblings are out. I wish I could say I feel better. But I don't....*sigh*

Right Now.

Right now it's 11 pm. Leo just got home a little bit ago.

He's been at work since who knows what time.

I keep thinking he isn't going to go...I'm a dreamer, I don't always like to believe in the truth {which can sometimes be a horrible trait...believe me when I tell you this...}.

I've been so busy with the girls. And the house. And Leo's family is here.

So it's nice. Busy. Full house.

But I'm really afraid for when he leaves. Then they leave.

My house is going to be so quiet.

Silent.

With the exception of tantrums, screaming, crying, etc.

And hopefully a sprinkling of laughter, happiness, singing.

I have a lot planned for the girls and I. Parks. Bouncey place. Picnics. Sleepover in Mommy's room. Crafts.

I also have a ton of giveaways that will be written and posted. That will take up a lot of time.

I guess I'm just going back in my memory to when Leo was deployed to Iraq. I lost so much weight. I was so lonely. So sad. So depressed. I'm so thankful I have Bella and Maddie now. They will be my reason to get up each and every day.

To laugh.

To love.

To be happy.

Right now.

Mind racing a million ways.

Heart is aching.

Plans are being made.

Happiness will continue.

I will be a better Mommy just knowing I have support from so many amazing family friends...

xoxo

*Sigh*

I feel torn a lot of the time. Torn between spending quality time with both of my girls. Torn on feeling like sometimes I just feel like I'm the world's worst mom.

Now, I know that isn't true. Not true at all. But the honest truth is that I *think* I am too hard on myself. I sometimes *pretend* I am super mom and I can complete everything that needs to be completed. Resulting in me staying up way. too. late. As in it's already the next day by the time I collapse onto my bed.

Which results in me being tired. And if the girls are grouchy it makes me grouchy. I know that I am only human, but it doesn't make me feel any less lousy if I snap at Isabella for another battle. Whether it be changing her diaper, brushing her teeth, cleaning her nose, washing her hair, fixing her hair. Girlfriend makes it all a power struggle. And it exhausts me. Don't get me wrong--I love how headstrong she is. I love that she is up for challenges. But every single day? That itself is tiring. Most of the time she is happy, silly and a total sweetheart. But this week has been hard. I had thought that maybe she was getting sick because of the amount of screaming and crying...but, no, she's just having a bad week. My heart hurts that I can't do anything else to help her be *happy*...and my heart hurts even more when I snap at her to just stop.

And poor Madelyn. Today when I was loading her into the car I told her how sorry I was that Isabella sometimes doesn't understand that I'm her momma, too. That I'm sorry when Isabella scratches her because she is jealous of Maddie getting a few moments of mommy time. It breaks my heart and makes me tear up at writing any of this. Maddie is the sweetest and happiest baby that I've ever met. I'm not kidding. She is wonderful. And I thank God that she is so happy, so sweet. And I also believe that God just knows that I need that right now. I need someone to be appreciative...to smile at me even when she is upset due to being hungry, she still gives me that huge smile of hers.

And then because I am exhausted I get irritable with Leo for why can't he just pick Madelyn up instead of playing his stupid video games. I get jealous of Leo for getting time to himself--even if it's only driving to and from work--it's still time he has all. to. himself. Don't get me wrong. I LOVE being a stay at home mom. But I also love remembering who I am. Regrouping. Clearing my head.

And then I cry...a lot...because of my weight. I hate it. I hate that it makes me this upset to see myself. I hate that when I see thin moms I get so jealous. I hate that I have hurt my knee with both running and the 30 day shred. I hate that it's raining a lot and I can't take the girls to go walk. I hate that I had swine flu and am finally feeling better. I know that crying won't solve anything. I know feeling like this won't do a thing. But it still sucks.

I feel bad for feeling bad! Crazy, right?! Crazy how hard I am on myself. Crazy that I am blessed beyond blessed to have so much good in my life and yet I still manage to find pity on things...

I'm not meaning to complain, I'm just trying to get these frustrations out so tomorrow when I wake up I'll be in a much better mood than today. And I think that it's worked. Because now I am going to bed. And going to wake up HAPPY.

Thanks for making it this far into reading this...sorry to be such a debbie downer!

Life? Is Good...

Life.

Such a simple word.

Yet so powerful.

My life is something I never thought I would have.

I never thought that life would or could be this good.

Sometimes?

I don't even feel like I deserve all that I have.

Sometimes?

I sit and cry for my angel baby. I miss him. I miss her. I want that child here.

Sometimes?

I think 'I want, I want, I want'.

Sometimes?

I have to remind myself of all that 'I have, I have, I have'.

I love my life.

My family.

My friends.

My blog friends.

But honestly?

I call my blog friends my true friends.

The ones that know so much about me.

That send me hugs.

That send me love.

That are here for me every single day.

I know this post is all over the place.

But when I think of life?

I think of the amazing the things.

The amazing opportunities.

The amazing family and friends.

That I am blessed with.

A {2} Year Old's Party in Pictures....

Party time!

It looked so cute--Bella LOVED it!

Yummy rainbow cupcakes with hot pink and green frosting that I made for my girl

On her tippy toes for a cupcake...

And she got it!

With her cousin, Mateo

Being silly with her friend, Isabella, and her cousin, Emma

Playing with a Dora balloon

Showering her cousin with love

In deep thought while playing with her bowling pins

Opening gifts sans tutu...

An exhausted Mommy with her precious birthday girl

Thank You. And You. And You....

I want to do an update on my Isabella.

But before I do...thank you.

And you.

And you.

Your kind words.

Personal stories.

Tears.

Prayers.

Thank you's to God.

Comforted me.

On a day such as Saturday.

I'm still in shock.

I cried hard. Last nite, the tears flowed.

Harder than I've ever cried before.

Thinking the unimaginable. What if.

My heart aches even thinking those thoughts.

I've never imagined my life without my girls.

I've never been more scared in my life.

I still have a tremendous amount of guilt.

I've hugged her and kissed her non-stop.

For those who know me?

I do that a lot already. So to imagine more?

Wow.

I didn't tell you all how a week before some scary things had also happened.

God spared us then, too.

How many close calls will we have?

I'm scared. Paranoid.

I'm sorry this is so long.

I need to get this stuff out. Off my chest.

As for Isabella?

My little wild one?

You'd never be able to tell anything had happened.

Happy.

Singing.

Dancing.

Hugging.

Kissing.

Bump free.

No telling me today 'head hurt'.

Cupcake eating (yes, I made her 2 dozen cupcakes. To share with mommy and daddy of course.).

Orange eating.

Popsicle loving.

Same Bella.

Different Mommy.

Different Daddy.

We saw our gift taken away for a moment.

And that moment has forever changed us.

Our family.

Our lives.

Love and hugs to all of you.

Hug your loved ones, your little ones a little tighter, okay?

And pass on a hug from Isabella.

As a thank you.

A Day No Parent Wants to Have. Ever.

I had to call 911 this morning. For my sweet, sweet Isabella.

It's not a call I ever wanted to make. And for one of my girls. Especially not for one of my daughters.

She fell off the bathroom counter this morning. Where she knows it's a no-no, yet I accidentally left the door open to the bathroom. I am the cause for this. Me. It kills me just realizing that.

When she fell she fell backwards. Her head hit our tile floor. I've always hated tile. It's hard. Unforgiving. Dangerous when wet, dangerous when you fall down. And to fall and hit your head? I get sick replaying this in my head.

She was laying there. On the floor. In shock. I ran over to her. Trying to get her to talk to me. I scoop her up in my arms.

"Bella!! Bella, talk to Mommy. Bella!!!! Come on, Bella, please look at Mommy!!" I was frantic.

She closed her eyes.

Started having a seizure.

I was screaming for Leo. Screaming for my baby to please, please wake up.

Leo grabs her.

Checks to see if she's breathing.

She is not.

My baby. My baby that I brought into this world. My baby that I had giggled with, talked to and snuggled with just a mere few hours before WAS NOT BREATHING.

Leo placed her on our bed. Gave her a rescue breath.

I'm dizzy, running for my phone.

Calling 911.

Scared.

Hating myself.

Shaking.

Praying.

Asking God please, please don't take my girl.

Her Dora party is next weekend. She'll only be {2}.

Please, she has her whole life ahead. Please.

Take me if you need someone. Do not take my girl. My #1.

I'm not done living life with my girl yet.

She coughs.

Leo's breath worked.

Ambulance arrives.

She's scared, crying.

One of her feet is curled, turned a funny way. Not normal.

Ambulance ride.

Long.

Scary.

Asking my friends pray.

Had called my mom.

Pray.

Please. Lift your prayers up to God. Our God.

Please.

She starts acting calmer.

Scared. But more like my girl.

CT scans.

Body checks.

Scan results are back.

Everything is okay.

Okay. My baby is okay.

Breathing.

Concussion.

But she is alive.

Hug your babies tight tonite.

And when you think that nothing could happen to you?

Your family?

Remember this post. Please.

Life is a gift.

Don't assume things will be okay forever.

Because I did.

I never thought this could.

Would.

Ever.

Happen.

A List of Happiness

~Glamour and Real Simple magazines. Something about reading a new issue when I have a few free moments...it's basically sanity after an insane day.

~Pumpkin spice lattes from Starbucks--or even pumpkin spice creamer for my morning coffee. Yum!

~My mom's and my grandma's banana bread recipe. Delish! I think I'm going to post it on here--it's sooo good. For reals.

~Yankee candles--especially the seasonal ones! Oh--I also have a coupon code for Yankee (I think it's buy 2 get 1 free (large jars). If you're interested email me and I'll send you the code!

~Fall flowers...hay bales...leaves changing color...leaves burning...crisp nites and mornings where I can leave my windows open.

~A hot cup (or two, or three) of coffee first thing in the morning. If nothing else goes right the rest of the day, I least I got to have some coffee to start my day off!

~Getting my hair done! I cannot wait to get it done...ahhhh!

~Sleeping in--Leo is awesome at letting me sleep in on the weekends. Is he amazing or what?!

~Having a great margarita at a great Mexican restaurant. Yum!

~Having a glass of wine at the end of the nite...or maybe two glasses...

So....

What things make YOU happy and just make you smile? Anything that I need to try out?

Must Love Wine, Crafts and Shopping...

Wanted:

Someone (a girl, please, no men....) who loves to craft. Willing to spend time making lots of fun crafts, learning craftiness. I'm willing to learn anything and teach any "skills" I may have.

Must also like to have wine and yummy margaritas. Preferably on the front or back porch while the kids are playing and the husbands/boyfriends/fiances are bbq'ing.

Bonus if you have children--they can play while we craft it up. Plus they are a great inspiration, right?

Likes to go to garage sales, craft shows, antique shops. Must love a bargain and must love finding a treasure that we can be proud of only spending a few bucks on.

Maybe start a bookclub of some sorts. But only if we agree on the book.

Likes to go get pedis, shopping and watching a movie at an actual movie theater!! Where we can eat popcorn and candy and pick out the movie of our choice. Sad, scary, happy--doesn't matter. Just going to the theater will make my day!

Oh--and we must live near each other in order for this to work out. I'm not so great at the whole long distance relationship thing....


***I wish I could place an ad like this! Is it really this hard to find people that live by you and that you truly want to hang out with? Is it because I'll be 30 in 12 days? Is it harder to make friends when you are older?***

I Take it Back--I Can Wait

I remember when Isabella was born and I marveled at how beautiful, tiny, innocent she was. She was a perfect human being--and I brought her into the world.

I remember always looking forward to that next milestone--holding up her head, rolling over, first tooth, crawling, talking, eating solids...I couldn't wait for her to hit each and every one of them.

Fast forward to yesterday. She got in for her 18 month check up and her ped couldn't believe that Isabella is now such a toddler. And it hit me.

I can wait for the next milestone. I want time to stand still...I want to remember everything. Every little thing.

Like how yesterday we were at the hospital and she stopped to softly touch the wall made out of small rocks.

How yesterday she took off her diaper and was running around naked shrieking with laughter.

How she takes everything in and has to know what everything is--"Sat? Sat?"

How she says momma--"Mamamamamama"....I never want to forget how that sounds.

How at every meal she tries to climb up on the table to eat no matter how many times we tell her no--the girl has determination, that's for sure.

I take it back. From the beginning when I said I can't wait.

Because I can. And I will.

Good Luck, Baby Brother

Adam,

I cannot believe I am typing this.

I cannot believe you leave on Wednesday.

The time has come for you to begin your transition into an adult.

In my mind I have always pushed this day out of my mind, out of my head, out of my thoughts.

I think in my own way I was trying to not see the inevitable. You have grown up.

In May I proudly watched you walk down and get your diploma.

I stood proud knowing how well you have always done in school, knowing all of your accomplishments and knowing everything you will achieve in the future.

Do you know I remember so vividly about when you were born?

I remember Mom going to the hospital.

I remember wearing my alley cat t-shirt that had neon puffy paint on it. Man I loved that shirt!

I remember seeing you and oohing and ahhing over you.

I think we thought you were our own personal and alive baby doll.

I remember spoiling you rotten when you were little.

I remember how we used to sneak you out of your crib at naptime because we could hear you talking in your room--Kristi and I KNEW you weren't tired and that all you really wanted was to play with your big sisters.

I remember how sweet you were (and still are) and how much you loved your big sisters.

I remember being so protective over you.

I remember your first crush on Kelly Taylor from down the street.

I remember you playing sports and how great you were at them.

I remember taking you to the mall.

I remember taking you to get ice cream.

I remember how your face would light up after seeing what Santa brought you.

I wish you luck at Mizzou, Adam.

I know you will not need it, but I think it's always nice to have a little extra luck laying around just in case.

I can't wait to send you your first care package. I hope you like it and I hope you won't be too embarrassed getting stuff from your big sis.

We love you, baby brother.

I can't wait to hear all of your fun stories about college.

Love,

Your most favorite oldest sis

Under My Skin

This post will probably be different than my usual posts.

Maybe it's the fact that it has poured down rain for three days straight.

Maybe it's because the teething is still happening with 3:30 wakeups.

Maybe it's because the people across the street got their home broke into.

In broad daylight.

(Just a sidenote--of course that would happen when I had an appointment on base today. I could have been a hero! I could have been a witness! I could have been my own neighborhood watch! But I wasn't. *sigh*)

I have found that I know certain people who don't really practice what they preach.

Not going into details, but it gets on my nerves.

And for me to blog about it?

That must really be saying something.

My blog is about my life. My family's life. My daughter's life.

One thing that I cannot stand is when a person will act fake.

Say one thing yet do another.

I cannot stand it when a person wants you to believe a certain thing yet how they treat you or act towards to you is different. Very, very different.

And the thing that I hate the most?

Is when this happens when NOBODY else is looking.

Not a soul. Just me.

Basically it boils down to me looking like a whiner.

A crybaby.

Somebody who is too sensitive.

But let me say one thing.

I am known of those.

Do not tell others something that you should be saying to my face.

Do not make me out to be selfish and unkind when maybe all I need to do is start showing you a mirror.

Or recording what is happening.

I am a nice, sweet, caring person.

And I do not deserve any of this.

Not one bit.

Okay.

I feel better now.

I will hopefully now sleep better at night knowing that this is all out there.

***Note--this is in no way related to anyone who reads my blog. I love you all and don't want anyone to take this the wrong way! It's just something that has bothered me for awhile and I have finally found a therapeutic way to get it all out and breathe a little easier.***

For a Moment We Were Flying

I remember when I was a little girl and how much I loved to swing.

At recess I would swing the entire time. I was shy and quiet--never really got into the loud crowd in elementary school.

The swings were the perfect playground toy for me.

I would kick my legs harder and harder until I was so high that I felt like I was flying.

For those few moments I really, truly was.

When it was summer vacation I would swing all day every day.

My sister and I would sing the theme song to The Neverending Story.

We would sing it until we we were hoarse.

We would sing it until we were swinging so high there was nothing else for us to do but to be lost in that moment.

For those summer days we were flying.

This past Saturday we went to the park.

Remember how I got to choose something fun to do?

I chose lots of fun things for us and my favorite fun thing that we did was going to the park.

I had my husband.

I had my daughter.

I had my step-daughter.

Life was perfect.

Nobody else was at the park.

Nobody but us.

The temperature was warm, but not too warm.

There was a slight breeze that made for a perfect afternoon of family time.

I sat down in a swing and intended to just swing back and forth with my toes dragging beneath me.

I sat down in a swing and had no idea about the flood of memories, happy memories, that would flood my head.

As I started swinging higher and higher I looked over to my sweet, sweet Isabella.

She was swinging, too.

And while I watched her swing I had a thought come to me.

There we both were, making new memories.

Memories that would never leave my head.

Because at that moment, we were both flying.

And flying our journey of life together.

Love, Your Guardian Angel

My darling little sister,

You do not know me, little sister, but I know you. I am your guardian angel.

You see, little sis, Momma and Daddy wanted you for so long. Oh, so long.

I know Momma has explained to you that I am in heaven watching over you and you know what?

I really love you.

I left to be in heaven because God needed me. He needed me up here to be with you at all times, to protect you when you are sick and to watch over you when you are sleeping.

Momma and Daddy wanted you for two years. I was in heaven waiting for those two long years. When I went to heaven Momma cried so hard. Daddy wiped her tears away.

I gave her hugs and kisses. I heard her tell me she loved me even though we never met face to face.

After seeing how hurt Momma was I talked to God. I told him my family needed an earth angel.

Each month Momma grew sadder and sadder. She started losing faith. She couldn't understand why I was in heaven and why there wasn't a child in her arms.

I then spoke to her one night while she was sleeping. I whispered in her ear you were on your way. When she awoke she thought she had dreamed about me giving her the message; that it wasn't real.

But it was real. I was right there by her side.

When Momma found out you were coming I was right there by her side holding onto her. I was with her when she read about you in baby books, I was with her when she found out you were a girl, I was with both of you as you entered into the world.

Momma wanted you so bad and I knew this was the best gift that she could be given. She needed you. She was ready to wipe someone else's tears and give them big hugs when they were sad.

So my little sister on your ten month birthday, I have a message for you.

I love you. I love you for being my sister. I love you for making Momma not cry anymore.

Happy 10 month birthday, Isabella. You are one very loved and wanted little girl.

Love always,
Your Guardian Angel

Momma Loves You, Bella Mella

Isabella is one of the silliest little girls that I know. Besides constantly making me smile and laugh, she is so silly! Maybe that is why she always makes me smile and laugh? Hehe :) Lately anytime she eats her baby food-doesn't matter what kind it is-she makes this sound, "Mmmmm. Mmmmm..." and it is every time she takes a bite! It is very comical!! My sister, Kristi, had valid point. When I was telling her of this latest trick, she asked if I say the same thing to her as I feed her. Why, yes, I do. And you know the sad thing? I never would have put 2 and 2 together....sheesh, I need more sleep!!

As you remember, Isabella got her shots yesterday. Last night she was all rosy cheeked and pink nosed with her little mouth chattering. We gave her Tylenol and then went to bed. This morning when she and I woke up I noticed her face was still pink and her little nose pink. I thought, hmmm, we were outside for a little while yesterday, but it was when the sun was going down...but is she sunburnt?! I then reached out to hold her and she was burning up. She felt like a warm little roll from the oven and I immediately knew she had a temperature. Sure enough, 101.7. My poor little girl. She has taken a lot of naps today (mommy even snuck in a long one w/her) and has been fussier than normal. The good thing is the Tylenol has kept it down and she is still eating normally. Maybe spare a prayer for my little one tonight? Thank you :)

Speaking of prayers, please say one for the son of one of my mom's friends. He is only 16 and was in a horrible, horrible car accident. He can use all the prayers that we send. When things like that happen, you often "wake up" a little. Life is so fragile, it can be taken from any one of us at any time. Sometimes we all get so caught up in so many things that aren't important. Take time every single day to thank God for blessing you with another day in the miracle of life. If you have children, tell them you love them every single day! I can't imagine what that poor family is going through. My heart aches for them. I wish there was something that I could do, but the one thing that I can do is pray. And pray hard.

So on that note, I am thanking God for giving me this day to live and see my family. May you all do the same and thank you for the prayers.